I received a “post-doc ad” today, one of which that I first thought of as a good opportunity (yep, I’m fitting the subject + it’s “theme free”/I’ll be learning new things or skills/This is a place I want to go/This is an interesting or new collaboration network and so on). There are a few such positions opening currently, and I’ll be back fishing in the job market soon. So far, so good.
The ad is nevertheless closing with a curious statement about compliance to the university honour code. Spotting some warning lights since it’s rather unusual for such a job profile. Of course I had to see all what this was about (hey, I was already thinking to apply!). I was thinking this had to do with conducting research, and since I’m already and naturally following quite stringent ethical guidelines for my work, why would this be an issue?
The thing is I can’t possibly apply for this position. Do you want reasons? Here they are:
– I have a beard (and even when I didn’t, I wasn’t shaving on a regular basis),
– I’m a coffee addict and I occasionnally indulge into drinking tea (or such harmful substances, does chocolate yet count?)
– Even if I’m on my way to quit smoking, I find tobacco attractive addictive,
– It happens that I drink a glass of wine or a beer occasionnally,
– I have two love children (and they are both lovely. Yes, you can be born outside mariage and be perfectly normal),
– some of my jokes cross the line where they have to be interpreted in a sexual context.
Hum… All of these are clear-cut departure from what is deemed acceptable from the honour code of the university. It clearly seems like I could not possibly get this position. Because of my scientific activities of course!
If I tell you this university is in the USA, would you guess which one it is?